Category Archives: Mental Health

As a kid, a snow day was a cause for celebration. The world feels quiet and magical. Responsibilities of school are gone for a day. Even though for me, as a child, cold sharp air meant more asthma troubles, snow days were still full of the fun of: sledding, snowball fights, igloos, and more. But, then we grow up…we get busy. Suddenly, snow days aren’t fun anymore. Now they mean driving in dangerous conditions, high heat bills, and just the same busy life of every other day.

I’ve been guilty of the same for years. Never taking a break until my body crashes and forces it. Making it a point of pride that I can be the MOST productive. The only way I could see that I added value was with my works. Why would people want me around if I was of ‘no use’ to them? I took all the motivational sayings to heart.

A good friend is ALWAYS there for you.

Don’t dream for success, work for it.

Always give your all, 110%.

The best never rest

What’s the problem with this and what does it have to do with snow? Well, I was so busy trying to be perfect….the perfect friend, the perfect worker, the perfect mom, the perfect citizen…that I forgot to just BE. I was so busy making goals and ‘crushing them’ I forgot to be happy with the present.

So now, when it’s a day of fresh snow, especially if it’s a weekend day of fresh snow, my whole household knows that means a day of rest. We live present in the moment. We don’t feel guilty about taking a break from being productive. We savor the quiet that snow brings and we rest. Rest is so hard for me, but I’m getting better. My house needs cleaning…but still I rest. I have work on the farmhouse…but still I rest. I have PLENTLY of work I could do, but life isn’t all about work. Sometimes, life is just about the miracle of being. I’m learning to let that be enough for me.

A few years ago I spent NYE making a vision board. I know, not really a thrilling night out on the town. NYE has historically never gone well for me so I’ve learned that a calm evening at home is what fits best in my life. When I made the first vision board I thought it was just a fun adult excuse to make a collage. Who didn’t love collages as a kid? Why not experience some of that carefree fun again? So my bestie and I ordered pizza and sat up pouring through magazines we had snagged off friends that actually still had subscriptions to such things. Both of us were redefining ourselves post divorce. The discovery who I was when not fully enmeshed in an unhealthy relationship was invigorating, and I was ready to set it out on paper proclaiming to the world (or really just myself).

I hung this first board on my wall in my bedroom so it was the first thing I saw when I went to sleep and woke up. I wanted to never lose who I was again. I wanted to get back in touch with things I enjoyed. I wanted to spend time outdoors and get back into the self-sustaining hobbies I had abandoned. When I was little all I wanted to do was to grow up and be like Laura Ingalls Wilder. I would get back to that.

And so I started. I did get out more. I hiked. I kayaked. I taught the kids nature journaling. I learned how to shoot. I learned how to care for and ride a horse. Seeing the board each day was the perfect gentle nudge. It was a great step in the right direction so the next year, I did it again.

In 2020 I had a lot more time at home to stare at this vision board. TOO MUCH TIME AT HOME. It was a year I feel like the whole world needs trauma therapy for. There were some silver linings though. One of those was that it become crystal clear that I wasn’t were I belonged. Surrounded by people in town burning the candle at both ends to try to be perfect for everyone and climb the corporate ladder as fast as possible was not providing the personal fulfillment I had always thought it would. I had a plan since high school and I followed that plan perfectly. I achieved all my goals, but I didn’t really feel accomplished. Where did I belong? What would fulfil me? I struggled through these thoughts for some time. I’m STILL working on understanding fulfillment, but it became clear where I belonged.

And so, in December of 2020 I started the planning to fully restore the old house on our family’s small farm. I started the plan to intentionally move away from what may look like success on paper and move toward what felt like success in my heart. I moved from how to do the most each day by being as efficient as possible to intentionally doing things the slow way. Throughout all this I’m learning and growing to live intentionally each day, and thus, Intentional Rural was born.